This Car is Controlled by the Deep State
This Car Is Controlled by the Deep State – Political Sticker
Not Paranoid. Just Early.
Why settle for a normal car decal when you could let the government know you’re onto them? Introducing the only political sticker brave enough to say what your aluminum foil hat’s been screaming since 2009:
“This Car Is Controlled by the Deep State.”
Printed on 8.5" x 2.5" of premium-grade chaos, this sticker is your one-way ticket to letting every tailgater, highway cop, and passing pedestrian know that you don’t trust anything—and you’re proud of it.
Perfect for drivers who think fluoride is a war crime and who refer to traffic cameras as “surveillance nodes.”
What Even Is the Deep State?
Great question. No one knows. But we’re pretty sure it’s real.
Could be a cabal. Could be lizard people. Could be your HOA president and that one weird squirrel who always stares at your window. Whatever it is, it’s definitely involved in managing your Bluetooth and turning your check engine light on.
This sticker doesn’t explain anything—it just accuses.
Who’s This Political Sticker For?
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People with five VPNs and one working headlight
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Dads who yell “this is all planned” at the TV
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Anyone who’s said the phrase “false flag” at least once
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Drivers who brake check Teslas on purpose
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Patriots, anarchists, and Reddit mods
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You. Probably.
Whether you're left, right, or completely off-grid, this sticker transcends party lines and common sense.
Product Details – Built to Survive the Illuminati
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Size: 8.5” x 2.5”
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Material: Commercial-grade, weatherproof vinyl
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Finish: Semi-gloss – reflective enough to distract drones
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Sticker Version: Permanent – like your distrust of the IRS
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Magnet (20 mil): Reusable – unlike your conspiracy subreddit
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Magnet Upgrade (30 mil): For cold climates & hot takes
Made by a small business with no known ties to the FBI (that we know of).
Where to Stick It
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Your bumper (next to your “I heart Edward Snowden” decal)
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Laptop (for conference calls where you say “allegedly” a lot)
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Mini fridge stocked with MREs
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Microwave door (don’t ask)
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That briefcase you haven’t opened since 2014
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Fridge at the office to keep people from stealing your soup
No matter where you slap this political sticker, it’ll raise eyebrows, questions, and your street credibility among men named Ron.
Sticker vs Magnet – Choose Your Level of Government Commitment
Sticker Version
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Sticks forever
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Just like that one theory you won’t shut up about
Magnet (20 mil)
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Reusable
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Peel it off before family functions
Magnet Upgrade (30 mil)
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Survives cold, wind, and NSA interference
Note: Most bumpers today are plastic—check with a fridge magnet or consult your bunker blueprints.
Installation Instructions – No Government Clearance Needed
Sticker:
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Clean the surface
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Apply sticker with the confidence of someone who hasn’t paid taxes since 2017
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Press down and hold
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Let cure 24 hours
Magnet:
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Stick it to a clean, flat metal surface
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Remove when being watched
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Reapply when safe
FAQ – Redacted for Your Safety
Is this political sticker waterproof?
Yes. Rain, snow, or chemtrails—it stays.
Can this get me on a watchlist?
Maybe. But weren’t you already on one?
Is it left-wing or right-wing?
It’s wingless. It crawls through the shadows and lives off YouTube comments.
Final Thoughts from the Surveillance Van
“This Car Is Controlled by the Deep State” isn’t a political sticker—it’s a warning, a confession, and a punchline all in one. It exists at the intersection of comedy, paranoia, and vibes.
If your playlist is 90% conspiracy podcasts, if you’ve ever yelled “open your eyes!” in a Wendy’s parking lot, or if you just think it's hilarious to keep people guessing—this sticker’s for you.
Buy it. Slap it. Deny everything.
And remember: just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they're not reading this description.