🦅 Dress Like Freedom Just Punched You in the Chest
Our merch is 100% liberty, 0% subtlety. Bald eagles may salute you.
He Raised You. Sort Of. 👨🍼
Reward his effort (and selective memory) with gifts he’ll chuckle at for years.
🆕 NEW STUFF JUST DROPPED. PANIC (BUY) ACCORDINGLY.
Blink and it’s gone. So don’t blink.
Headwear With Zero Chill
Subtlety is for bald caps.
Smells Like My Last Good Decision
Burning away the evidence of questionable life choices.
LOL-Worthy Finds 😂
Check Out Our Funniest Featured Products!
Most Wanted 🎁
Shop By Collections
Why Shut Up And Take My Money?
What they sayin' ✨
Just when I thought I'm tired of actual penises and penis jokes, I found out about TireCockz. Total game changer not only in the household, but also the neighborhood. I mean, It's a cock, on your tire. It's not too aggresive but it surely give a certain sense of class when you have it on.
I saw this first as a bad idea, but I didn't expect the amount of fun me and my friends can have with it. It's four pieces of valve caps shapes as phalluses, there's nothing much to it. That was the case until we started replacing random valve caps in the mall parking lot. Crazy times we live in, man.
You can't BBQ here...
Pooping Dogs Calendar has been the funniest thing I ever bought off the internet, and I'm just glad it came to me in one piece and in super good condition. Kudos!
I bought a shirt with my face printed on it and made my boyfriend wear it in case he forgot that he's taken.
FAQs
Orders are delivered usually within 2-5 days. The delivery time for your order depends on several factors, such as your location and the shipping method you choose. We usually provide an estimated delivery time frame at checkout, which can vary depending on the carrier's service level. You can track your order online or contact us for an update.
We want you to be completely satisfied with your purchase. If you are not happy with your order, you can return it within 30 days of the delivery date for a full refund or exchange. The item must be in its original condition with all tags attached. Please note that some items are non-returnable. Check our return policy page for more details.
Send us an email at contact@shutupandtakemymoney.com
Yes, we offer international shipping to many countries. However, shipping times and costs may vary depending on your location. Please note that some items may not be eligible for international shipping due to customs regulations. You can check our shipping policy page for more information.
Absolutely. We've proudly been in business for over 10 years now, have over 1 million fans on social media, and have shipped out countless orders to our many fans . Plus, we wouldn't want to scam you out of your hard-earned money anyway. We'd rather sell you something so amazing that you'll be convinced we're magic geniuses who can make anything happen.